Danish priest urges children of alcoholic parents to maintain family ties, sparking backlash

A Danish priest’s call for children of alcoholic parents to avoid cutting off family contact has drawn sharp criticism from support groups and individuals who grew up in such households, Danish broadcaster DR reports.

In an episode of Indefra med Anders Agger, priest Christina Philipstatt said she could not understand why people would sever ties with family over alcohol misuse, acknowledging that while alcohol “is often stronger than love,” she believed children should “go the extra mile” to preserve relationships.

Her remarks followed a segment in Grenaa’s Fredensgade, where many residents with alcohol dependencies have lost contact with their children. Philipstatt stressed she did not intend to judge those who cannot maintain such relationships, recognizing there are often valid reasons.

But her comments prompted a flood of reactions, including from TUBA, a national support organization for children of parents with substance abuse issues. Landsleder Bente Ryberg told DR that while TUBA does not advise for or against cutting ties, those who do so rarely act out of choice. “It’s because they feel it’s necessary for their own mental health and well-being,” she said.

Thor Allentoft, who runs the Instagram community Creating a Voice for adult children of parents with addictions, also received messages from people affected by the broadcast. He argued the program failed to capture the complexity of such decisions. “No child cuts off a parent lightly,” he said, adding that many underestimate how many “extra miles” these children endure, even as adults.

Philipstatt, who herself grew up with an alcoholic father, later clarified she did not mean to condemn those who distance themselves. She described her father’s violent outbursts—including an incident where he hurled dinner plates at her mother—and her own struggles with guilt after refusing to see him shortly before his suicide.

Support resources are available through Denmark’s Alkolinjen helpline at 80 200 500.