Mother said beatings were a normal way to raise children

A mother whose four daughters suffered prolonged abuse at home in Reykjanesbær told police that people in their cultural community commonly said, “I’m going to kill you,” and did not mean to act on the threat, mbl.is reported. She also considered beatings with belts and slippers a normal child-rearing practice in the country she referred to, according to a ruling on contact with one of her daughters.

The girls’ father, who came to Iceland in 2017 and holds Egyptian and Venezuelan citizenship, was convicted of serious offences against the four daughters and his then-wife. Iceland’s Court of Appeal sentenced him to two years in prison in November 2022. The mother was convicted of repeated violence against the three eldest girls and received a six-month suspended sentence.

Nearly two years later, the Immigration Appeals Board upheld the revocation of the father’s international protection, his expulsion and a 10-year re-entry ban.

The case came to light in June 2020, when one of the sisters told her sports coach that she expected her father to beat her when she got home from training. She said he regularly beat her and her sisters. The coach reported the matter to child protection services. About a month later, the girls described their home life to another coach. In August, all four were placed outside the home.

The eldest sister told child protection services that her father shut the windows and locked the doors so his shouting and the girls’ crying could not be heard outside. She said he hit them with a belt if they stayed out too long, had not studied at home or gave the wrong answer when he tested them on multiplication. If she cried from the blows, she said, he became angry and kept beating her until she stopped.

The mother told police that the father sometimes took the three older girls into their bedroom, locked the door and beat them. She said she would be outside with the youngest daughter and could hear the others promising to study. He most often used his slippers, she said, wearing them out almost completely. The mother said he had told her he did it because he loved the girls and was repeating what he had experienced as a child.

The court found that the father repeatedly beat the three older girls between February 15, 2019, and August 19, 2020, using a belt, belt buckle, shoes, a clothes hanger, an open hand or whatever was at hand.

The mother also told police that the father’s use of the phrase “I’m going to kill you” was like using an insult in their cultural community, and that the words were not followed by action. The case is among those in Iceland’s legal system in recent years in which different cultural norms have appeared to clash, particularly over women’s rights and position in society.