Fathers in Helsinki reflect on separation during Father’s Day event in Pasila

Today is Father’s Day, a day often envisioned with smiling fathers enjoying breakfast in bed made by their partners and children. However, a celebration in Pasila, Helsinki, highlighted a different reality, where smiles were scarce for fathers unable to meet their children.

Pertti Knihtilä, a resident of Vantaa, expressed his pain, stating he thinks of and misses his 30-year-old daughter every day, having not seen her for almost three decades. “I’ve lost tens of thousands of precious moments with my child,” he lamented. He, along with nearly ten other fathers, attended a peer support event organized by the association “Fathers on Children’s Side.”

Alen Zeba from Helsinki recently saw his 9- and 11-year-old sons for the first time in eight months. “I would have liked to be with my children today,” he shared. Other fathers present chose to remain anonymous due to the sensitive nature of their situations. Some spoke of reminiscing about their children through old photographs as they felt isolated from their lives.

The event’s invitation addressed the challenges many fathers face on this day, particularly when their connection with their children has become strained or entirely severed. Sari Ignatius, a member of the association’s board, noted that issues of financial strain and resentment often underpin these challenges. She emphasized the importance of children having access to both parents, regardless of their living arrangements.

Ignatius added that when a child’s connection to their father is cut off, it can also erase ties to paternal relatives, depriving the child of valuable relationships. She reflected on her own upbringing in a loving community but acknowledged an enduring desire to know her biological father. The event has been held on previous Father’s Days, providing ongoing support for these fathers.