Mikael Gyllström takes up violin again 50 years after abuse

Mikael Gyllström has picked up his violin again, five decades after childhood abuse made the instrument difficult to face. He is reclaiming what he says was taken from him, SVT reports.

Gyllström was 13 when he met filmmaker Staffan Hildebrand at Delsbostämman, a folk music gathering in Hälsingland. Hildebrand, then nearly 29, was there to make a documentary. The meeting marked the beginning of several years of abuse.

Hildebrand has described the relationship as a love story and said he fell “in love at first sight.” He has acknowledged that he acted wrongly, while saying he did not understand that at the time. “It wasn’t his fault, it was my fault. And I apologise for that,” he said.

The violin had been a major part of Gyllström’s life, but for decades it was closely associated with the abuse. In the final episode of the SVT documentary series Dokument inifrån: Pojkarna, regissören och sanningen, he describes how places, smells and sounds linked to Hildebrand’s abuse have affected him. “It has coloured everything I’ve done, all my choices, all my relationships,” he says. He adds that it has created many obstacles to functioning in everyday life.

In the episode, Gyllström visits Hildebrand’s former apartment in Stockholm and returns to Delsbostämman, where he reconnects with his violin. “There has been a change during this journey. I won’t go into crisis and collapse,” he says. The final episode is available on SVT Play and is scheduled to air on SVT1 at 21:00 on Tuesday.