Helsinki woman navigates unconventional relationship amid growing trend of ‘casual dating’
Earlier this year, a 33-year-old woman from Helsinki, named Aino, unexpectedly found herself drawn to an old acquaintance. The feeling was mutual, and Aino quickly realized this was someone she enjoyed spending time with. She describes their relationship as respectful, confidential, and caring, filled with laughter and shared humor. She even admits the idea of spending the rest of her life with him crossed her mind. However, despite their relationship ticking all the boxes of a romantic partnership, Aino isn’t ready to define it as such.
Having just ended a long-term relationship and purchased her first home, Aino feels she needs time to breathe and explore life as a single woman. The idea of committing to another significant relationship, with its inherent responsibilities and future planning, feels too overwhelming. She’s adamant about not being ready for a ‘serious’ relationship, even though her partner is keen on defining their bond as one.
Aino explains their relationship status as more than just ‘friends with benefits’. They’ve agreed not to see other people, maintaining open communication and transparency from the start. To outsiders, it might seem like a typical relationship, but Aino is resisting the label.
Traditional relationship milestones seem to be evolving, with more people opting for ‘casual dating’ instead of committed relationships. Heli Vaaranen, a psychotherapist and expert from the Family Federation, describes it as a trend, adding that commitment is becoming increasingly challenging in modern times. However, studies reveal that committed relationships still remain a popular aspiration.
Aino is content with her current relationship and appreciates her partner’s understanding regarding her need for freedom. They’ve agreed to evaluate the status of their relationship in September, where they’ll discuss their individual situations and future plans. Aino hopes that their relationship can continue in a way that satisfies both their wishes. She admits it would be painful to part ways, but understands it might be necessary if their desires diverge. “I can’t expect him to linger in this state of limbo forever,” she says.